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Friendship Index: A Self-Assessment Quiz
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Heart
When have you participated in a live musical worship experience led by people from a different culture, socioeconomic group, or language?
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Within the last 6 months in the US
Within the last 2 years in the US
I’ve never participated in live worship led by people outside of my own culture, income bracket, or language
Within the last year, but not in the US
Other
Have you, at some point in your life, had an important mentor figure?
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No, I’ve never had an important mentor figure.
Yes, and they were from a different socioeconomic background to me.
Yes. They were from a similar socioeconomic background to me.
I’ve had people speak wisdom into my life, but never a deep, long-term mentoring relationship.
Think about the last 5 Psalms or Scripture passages you’ve read, prayed, or sung. What genre might these have been?
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I’m honestly not sure this matters for how I relate to others.
Some praise, promises, or exhortation and some lament or prophetic correction
Mostly lament/prophetic correction with some praise/promise/exhortation
Mostly praise/promise/exhortation (or thanksgiving)
Other (narrative, etc.)
When you read Old Testament passages commanding care for the poor, foreigners, the sick, or oppressed, how do you interpret these?
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I’m not sure how to determine which OT laws are ceremonial/cultural and which ones still apply.
The OT Law has been fulfilled, so these commands don’t apply any longer.
I seek to follow these OT laws and apply them, repenting and seeking God’s forgiveness when I fail.
I know these OT laws are referring to God’s vision for a just society, but I’m not sure how best to live them out in today’s culture.
Hospitality
Have you ever been to a potluck dinner with people who live near or below the poverty line?
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Yes, we enjoyed our fellowship together!
No, I’ve never done this before.
Yes, we enjoyed our fellowship and the dishes they brought were delicious!
Maybe, I’m not sure what their income level was, though.
In the past year, how many times have you eaten a meal in the home of someone living on a lower income than you (not counting family members)?
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Twice
Once
Three or more
I haven’t this year.
I’m not sure of the income level of my hosts.
Suppose you had a child in 2nd grade. If her classmate invited her to a birthday party at a city park in a neighborhood on the low-income side of town, what would you do?
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Take your child to the party, keeping one eye on your car and the other on her the whole time
My child doesn’t (or isn’t likely to) have any friends who would invite her to a party in a place like that
Find an excuse not to go since you would not be comfortable in that environment
Go to the party, enjoy some cake, and get to know the other adults there
You are baking a cake, and realize you need 3 eggs. No one on your street is home except a neighbor who lives on a much lower income than you. What do you do?
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Drive 5 minutes to the closest convenience store for overpriced eggs
Ask your neighbor if you can have 3 eggs and offer to share some cake with her when you’re done
Explain the situation to your neighbor and ask if she’d give you the 3 eggs
Ask your neighbor to borrow the 3 eggs, and offer to pay for or replace them
Space
Have you ever known someone who lost a job when they lost access to their source of transportation?
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Not that I can think of
I have known one or two people who experienced this
Yes, it happens fairly regularly with people I know
I think I did hear of someone in my community that that happened to
How many check cashing or payday lending stores do you pass on your route between home and church?
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One or two
I’m not sure
Three or more
None
How many language or cultural groups are represented within a 2-mile radius of where you live?
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I’m not sure
Overwhelmingly from one dominant group
Two to Four
Five or More
Say you are asked to participate in a church service project in a low-income community. What is your initial response?
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Look forward to meeting and serving different kinds brothers and sisters
Look for a different type of service opportunity
Consider how you might fit this project into your busy schedule
Avoid the commitment
Church
Someone answers their cell phone during the church service. A minute later, their kids cry and drop the car keys loudly. The people around them in church will most likely feel:
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Frustrated and distracted
Like that’s a normal part of life
Curious or compassionate
Mildly annoyed
If a visitor came to your church and kept up a verbal commentary during the sermon – either to the pastor or the people nearby – the people in your church will most likely:
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Think it was funny or intriguing
Be very distracted and find it hard to concentrate
Be mildly irritated
Join in
Suppose you were nearly at church one Sunday morning when you discover your shirt/blouse has a huge hole. The only thing you have in the car is a wrinkled T-shirt in a gym bag. Would you:
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Return home and watch the service live-streamed online
Feel a little embarrassed, but wear the T-shirt anyway
Go home to change clothes so as not to stick out like a sore thumb, even though it means missing half of the service
Rejoice that the T-shirt is there and put it on because nobody at church will bat an eye
How often has a sermon or devotional made you significantly uncomfortable with the status quo of your life or church?
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Nearly every week
Occasionally
Frequently
Almost never
Money
Think about the people you’ve hired over the past year – whether in a formal work environment, or for odd jobs around your house. How many of them live on a low-income?
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At least one of them lives on a low income
All of them were from low-income backgrounds
I’ve hired people, but they were all more or less middle class
I haven’t hired anyone at all.
I don’t know.
Say a small restaurant opened down the street from your house. Imagine it’s operated by someone of a different culture, race, or socioeconomic group from you. You’ve heard the food is good, but the service is unorganized. What is your most likely response when visiting?
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Frequent the restaurant often and work to build a relationship with the owner and staff, offering feedback occasionally
Wait a minute to be seated, but go somewhere else if things get too unpredictable
Plan to come back sometime, telling your friends in order to support the place
Politely try eating there once, but are not likely to come back if things aren’t great
Suppose you meet someone at a transitional housing shelter where your church volunteers a couple of times a year. This person tells you he needs a job and is willing to do just about anything. At the same time, you have a friend who owns a coffee shop and is always worried about staff turnover in the kitchen. Would you:
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Desire to tell the man to inquire at your friend’s coffee shop, but think better of it because you don’t really know him.
Call your friend from the shelter and ask if he currently needs part-time help.
Tell the man about the shop and make a mental note to see if your friend has any openings.
Avoid connecting these two people as too much risk is involved for both of them.
Say you’re out with a group of friends and one brings up his struggle with money, wages, or salary numbers. He seems like he’s looking for advice and empathy. What is your most likely response?
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Open up about details of your own financial mistakes and successes, and offer to connect him to another friend who could provide expert advice
Join him in empathizing about how tough the times are (whether you’re really struggling or not)
Share a few of your personal financial mistakes and successes, withholding only specific numbers
Share some general wisdom, but shy away from talking about specifics of salary or costs of your assets
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